HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."

HEART'S DESIRE
                      A secret I carry and keep
                      As locked within I hold it deep
                      For in my eyes he's all I see
                      So strong and gentle;honestly.

                      Within my heart I hold him dear
                      As my feelings grow I start to fear
                      As my heart tells me I want him more
                     I realize I've never been here before.

                      Longing so much to take the chance
                      Questioning the pain to reach the final dance
                      To feel his arms around my waist
                      To finally feel the addiction of his taste.

                      Lost within I just don't know
                      If I can ever let him go
                      For as I lay me down to dream
                      I know the name that I will scream.

                      For every tear my lonliness crys
                      My love for him reaches out and drys
                      When thoughts of him consume my soul
                      I long to reach out and lose control.

                      To bring him where he longs to be
                      Within embrace next to me.



                              TO:ELLIOT STABLER
                              LOVE:OLIVIA BENSON

This fic is rated NC17.I hope everyone enjoys it.

                          CAN'T ESCAPE MY LOVE
                           (Chapter 1)
  The squad room was quiet and dark as Olivia and Elliot were the only
two still there finishing up their paper work on their lastest case.As
silence filled the room Olivia noticed Elliot was occupied with alot
more then his last minute paper work.Breaking the silence Olivia looked
over at Elliot and said,"Elliot are you ok?Do you need to talk about
something?"Looking up at Olivia Elliot just smiled and said,"I don't know
how you do it,you are always so willing to be here for others and help
in any way that you can as you are with your job,it amazes me that you
never get tired of doing it at work or away from work."Smiling Olivia
said,"Well you know someone has to keep you in line,Kathy can't come to
work and hold your hand every day so I figure I'll do it."Laughing at
Olivia's comments Elliot's face went blank as fast as he laughed.Getting
up from her desk Olivia walked around to Elliot's pulling over a chair
from another desk and put her hand over his saying Elliot is it
Kathy,are you having trouble with things again?Elliot shook his head,now
practically in tears he looked up at Olivia and said,"I don't know what
happened,I just don't understand it."

  "I'm here for you Elliot,take your time and tell me what's going on."
Looking down at the floor Elliot searched his heart and his mind trying
to find the right way to tell Olivia what was going on between him and
Kathy.

  "It's over Liv,she's leaving me."Closing her eyes knowing how painful
it all is for Elliot Olivia leans into him and embraces him in her
arms.Pulling back Olivia says,"Elliot I'm so very sorry,is there anything I
can do for you,anything just name it."Smiling Elliot looked at Olivia
and said,"Please don't let go of my hand,I need a great friend right now
and you are it;you've always supported me and been here for me through
out all of my difficult times and now more then ever before I need your
friendship and comfort."Smiling Olivia placed her hand on Elliot's once
again saying,"You know you can count on me,I'm always here for
you."Smiling Elliot said,"Yeah I know.that's what makes you such a great person
and my best friend."Finishing up their paper work Elliot offered to
drop Olivia off at home and she accepted.When they reached her apartment
Olivia turned looking at Elliot and said,"Listen,if you ever need a
place to stay my door is always open for you,I'm here and always will
be,call me anytime ok?"Smiling Elliot shook his head yes at Olivia's
offer,smiling back Olivia got out of the car saying good night and Elliot
called her name beore she closed the door and said,"Thanks."

  Olivia's phone began to ring at 5:35 in the Am and as she roled over
to pick it up she heard Cragen's voice on the other end."Olivia we have
a serial rapist and the loose and we need elliot and yourself to get
here as soon as possible." Wiping the sleep out of her eyes Olivia
said,"Ok Captain we'll be there as soona s possible.I'll phone Elliot and let
him know."Hangin up the phone Olivia dragged herself out of bed and
just as she was going to the washrrom to wash up there was a knock at her
door."Just a moment please"she hollered.When she opened hte door
therestood Elliot suit case in hand and tears in his eyes he said,"She
through me out Liv,I have nowhere to go."grabbing Elliot's arms she pulled
him into her apartment and said,"It's ok Elliot,you can stay here,not a
problem."Shocked Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"No,you don't have
to..........and before he could finish Olivia placed her finger over his
lips and said,"Listen,I told you last night my door is always open for
you at anytime,you need a place to stay so your staying,no arguements
ok?"Putting his suit case down on the floor Elliot said,"Yes mam."
Managing a smile Olivia told him that they had a new case to work on."I just
got off the phone with Craigen so I'm going to go take a shower and then
we will be on our way so make yourself comfortable and I'll be ready
soon."Smiling Elliot thanked Olivia and sat down on her couch to wait for
her to get her shower.

  When Olivia was dressed and ready to go she went into the livingroom
and her and Elliot headed out the door to the station.On the ride to the
station silence filled the car until Elliot looked over at Olivia and
said,"You know you look very nice today."Shocked and not knowing how to
respond she looked over at Elliot and said,"thanks." wondering at the
same time where that came from,she had never received a compliment about
her looks from him before,now Fin and Munch were another story and even
Cragen one time on a case when she was called from her date she was
wearing a beautiful dress and Cragen had said with a smile,"Nice dress
."To which Olivia replied ,"Don't start."Although surprised Olivia felt it
was a nice surprise,she had always thought of Elliot as her best friend
however she also wondered in the back of her mind on occassion what it
would be like to date him and get to know him in a more personal
intimate way,waht kind of lover would he be she had asked herself a few times
in the past.

  When they got to the station and went inside Cragen filled them in on
the case."This guy is obviously a maniac who needs to be
caught,something I don't have to lecture you all on.The autopsy showed multiple
stab
wounds to the chest right thigh and lower abdomen,a rape exam was done
and the victim has fluids on her inner thigh and reddness and swollen
on the inside of her.This woman is aproximately in her early 20's single
and worked for the NYC School Board.So let's get to work,Olivia and
Elliot you can go question her parents and find out if she had any enemies
or perhaps someone that was holding a grudge against her that they may
know about.Munch and Fin I want you two to canvas the area she was
found in,question the neighbors and see if anyone saw or heard
anything.Let's try and get what we can fast on this guy,I don't want him
striking
again."
  When Olivia and Elliot arrived at Gillian's parents home Olivia
knocked on the door.Elliot looked very much distracted and Olivia placed her
hand on his arm asking him if he was ok."Yeah,I'll be fine,let's just
do this."Gillian's mom answered the door as Olivia and Elliot pulled out
their badges,Hi I'm Olivia Benson and this is Elliot Stabler from
Specail Victims we'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."
Holding a kleenx in her hand Gillian's mom waved in through the door.My
name is Catherine,please come ina nd sit down,woul you like a drink or
anything?" Shaking their heads no and saying thank you Olivia and
Elliot sat down in the living room.Pulling out her note pad Olivia said,"Did
your daughter have any enemies,someone who might want to hurt her for
any reason,maybe holding a grudge against her for something?"

"No,nothing,Gillian was such a wonderful girl,so full of life and
always wanting to help others nad she wassuch a wonderful friend and
daughter,well behanved and always willing to help out anyone with anything
which is why I can't understand how or why such a horrible thing
happened.."Hanging her head Olivia wrote down all that Catherine had said about
her daughter Gillian.She went on to ask,"Was there a boyfriend from her
past that maybe she had trouble with who may have been bothering her?"
"I don't recall his name howver she was seeing this one man who to me
seemed to of had somewhat of a bad temper,always was angry easy and at
times I could see him being jealeous and possevive of her.I tryedtalking
with her about it however she told me everything was fine and she could
handle it and that was the last of it.It was never spoke of or brought
up again and then before I knew it hey broke up."

"How long ago did they break up" Elliot asked.
"About 2 or 3 months ago now."
"Do you have this guys address?" Olivia asked.
"Actually yes I do just hold on a minute I'll runa nd get my address
book to look it up for you."
while Catherine was gone Elliot looked at Olivia and said,"once we get
his address we'll go question this guy if we can find him."
"Ok,sounds good."Sitting in silence waiting for Catherine to return
Elliot kept stealing looks at Olivia from the corners of his eyes thinking
to himself why is it I see her differently now,she's amazing
looking,have I always noticed her nad just didn't want to admit it or what?Lost
in his thoughts of her Olivia looked over at Elliot and caught him
starring at her as if he was a high school teeneage with a crush.Smiling she
began to blush and said,"What is taking Catherine so long I wonder.I'm
going to see if she is ok.Entering into the kitchen to her horror
Olivia screamed for Elliot,when he entered he kitchen he couldn't beleive
it,Catherine was gone,they seached the entire house and no one was found.
"Is it just me or is this case getting more strange as time goes by"
Elliot said.Making their way back to the car they drove back to the
station to inform Cragen about what had happened.

Walking into the station they saw Munch Fin and Cragen talking so they
approached them."Captain'" Elliot said,"We have a problem.Our victims
mother disappeared while we were there,she went into the kitchen to get
us the address of her daughter's ex boyfriend,she was takeing a while
so Liv went to see what was taking so long and she was gone."
"Ok,what did she tell you?"
"Well,she said as far as she new her daughter had no enemies but this
ex of hers seenemed to be possesive and obsessed with her and so the
mother talked with Gillian and Gillian told her it was fine and not to
worry then not long after that Gillian and her boyfriend had broken up and
that was it." Olivia told Cragen.
"Well Olivia,you and Elliot go to the school board and see if they know
anything,speak to her boss and her colleagues,I want to ge tthis guy
before he makes this a habit."

On their way to the school board Olivia looked at Elliot and said,"How
are you doing,are you ok?"Elliot responded by saying,
"I'm doing ok,I just can't believe my relationship with kathy is over
and I won't see my kids on a regular basis anymore,that'sharder to
handle then anything."Placing her hand on Elliot's knee Olivia said,"Things
will work out and hopfully you and Kathy can make a fair deal about the
children,she knows you love them Elliot,everyone can see that."As they
pulled into the driveway of the school board buliding Elliot looked
over at Olivia smiling and thanked her for her kind words.As they got out
of the car to enter the school board building another car pulled up
beside them,it was Munch and Fin.Fin rolled down his passenger side window
nad said,"We just found Catherine,Gillian's mom in an ally 4 blocks
from their house.Captain'wanted us to swing by here and ask you to come to
the crime scene with us andthen go to the ME's office and stay there
until they have the autopsy finished."Olivia nodded and said,"Ok we'll
follow you there."

Getting back, into their car Olivia and Elliot followed Munch and Fin
to the crime scene in silence."Looks like htis perp is stopping at
nothing to cover all of his tracks,doesn't want anyone left to help us make
our case" Elliot stated.Looking at the body Olivia noticed that the
mother's right breast was cut and tehre were also stab wounds to her right
thigh and torso just like her daughters wounds only her daughter's
breats weren't touched."Ok guys what does this mean,is he trying to throw
us off somehow?All of the wounds on Catherine's body are the same as on
her daughter's except the cut on her right breast."
"Wait a minute" Elliot said,"When we questioned her mother the father
was nowhereto be found.If he wasn't at work would it be at all possible
when we were there he was upstairs listening and he had someone go to
his house take his wife to a location until we left an then went there
and killed her?What if her husband is our perp?" Everyone just stared at
each other with anger in their eyes knowing whoever this person was
they had to be stopped and fast.Olivia and Elliot left he scene to go to
the ME's office and Munch and Fin went to the school board to question
Gillian's boss and colleagues.

Upon entering the school board building Munch and Fin were approached
by a man in his mid 30's light blond hair blue eyes and a very
distinguishing smile."May I help you"the man asked.
"I'm Tutupola and this is my Partner Munch we are from Special Victims
Unit,we would like to ask you some questions about Gillian Bouler."
"Sure come this way."Leding Fin and Munch into a rom in the back of the
building The amn introduced himself as David Brown."I was Gillian's
boss,she was such a wonderful woman,very pleasent to work with and always
so friendly and charming,I can't believe this happened to her."
"We're very sorry for your loss" Munch said.
"Do you know if she had any enemies who would want revenge against her
for anything or someone who just didn't like her and was jealoeous? Fin
asked.
"No,no ne.She was so friendly and sweet,everyone loved having her
working here,she got along with everybody."
"Was she dating anyone that worked here" Munch asked.
"Her policy was to not date employees,she was approached by a few
people however,never accepted on the account she didn't want to mix buisness
with pleasure."
"We will need to know who the people were that approached her for
dates" Munch stated.
"ok,there was Mitchell,he thought she was amazing and wanted a chance
to get to know her better,he was always saying how beautiful she was and
how determined he as to get a date with her.Then tehre was Darren,he
saw her a sa wonderful person who deserved happiness and thought she
could find it with him.They are the only two."
"ok,are either one of them working today" asked Fin.
"Yes actuallythey are,I can have them come down here so you can speak
with them and I cna leave you alone in my office here to talk.if you
like?"
"Sure,thanks very much."
"No pronblem,I'll be right back."
As David left his office Munch looked at Fin and said,"Is it just me or
does he seem like he's a little nerveous?"
Smiling Fin said,"I'd be nerveous to if I saw the likes of you in your
long dark trench coat and sun glasses coming towrds me,you look like a
conspiracy yourself sometimes."
"Laughing Munch said,"Yes but you love me anyway."
Just then Mitch and Darren entered the office.Fin and Munch identified
themselves and then proceeded to question the two gentlemen."Either one
of you tell us what happened to Gillian?we heard you were both very
interested in dating her."Fin said.Looking at each other and swallowing
very hard they both said,"Yeah we were interested in Gillian however she
wan't interested in us so we left it at htat."
"You weren't angry that sherejected you,turned you down,I mean afterall
most people get very pissed off when they keep getting rejected,it's
not good for the ego or self esteem" Fin continued.
"Look" Darren said,"I was interested in getting to know her and having
some fun."
"So when she turned you down one time too many you raped and killed
her" Munch asked.Before he could answer Fin said,"You boys are coming with
us so we can fionish this at the station,let's go."
"Thanks Mr.Brown,we'll se ourselves out" Munch said.

At the ME's office Olivia and Elliot were waiting for the ME to finish
up the autopsy."Well Catherine has all the same wounds as her daughter
Gillian however there is evidence that she was beaten several times,she
has a fractured colloar bone,her right leg is broken in three places
there are bruises all, over her back and left leg and there are cuts
above and below her left and right breasts and she was raped.This woman was
put through pure hell before they killed her."Looking at each other in
discust of what htey were just told Olivia and Elliot thanked the ME
and left.

On their way back to the station Olivia's cell phone rang,"Benson."
"Olivia,it's Cragen, youa nd Elliot better get back here,we ahve to
guys here now that Munch and Fin are questioning that worked with Gillian
on the school board."Ok Captin' we're on our way."
"That was Cragen,they have two guys from the school board they are
qauestioning right now." Olivia told Elliot.
"Ok,let's go see what they've got to say." Elliot said.Arriving at the
station Olivia and Elliot enter into the interegation room to watch
from behind the window with Cragen."het Elliot" said,they have anything
yet?"
"Not yet,I think they are about to crack any minute now
though."Standing there patiently listening to Munch and Fin question the
suspects
Darren jumps out of his chair and screams "I never meant to hurt her,I only
wanted to love her."With tears streaming down his face hesat back down
placing his hnads over his face.Mitchell then confessed that he to
raped her but they both flat out denied killing her and there was something
about how they said it htat made Fin and Munch believe them."You have
to understand,Darren said,"I just wanted to know what it was like to be
with her,she acted like it was so bad to give me a chance,to be with me
was so terrible to her so I showed her and I took what was mine to
take."Approaching Darren Fin said,"That's we're your wrong,she wasn't
yours,she's not a possesion,she was a person,how could you do such a
terrible thing?" Then Mitchell said,"See,everyone acts like it'sso terrible to
be with us,like we are nobodies and we don't matter.
"You don't matter" Munch said as he got up to leave the room.Following
behind him Fin walked out."Well we have our rapists now all we need is
our killer" Fin said.
"I'm willing to bet these two know who the killer is,let me have a shot
at them. Olivia asked.Entering the room Mitchell and Darren looked at
Olivia as she sat down.
"Hey boys,we know you both raped Gillian but we believe you did not
kill her,however if you know who did we need you to help us."
"What do we get out of it?" Darren asked.
"You get the satisfaction of doing the right thing before your asses
are thrown in jail."

Outside of the iteregation room Elliot was suddenly getting turned on
by Olivia's toughness,he couldn't believe it,he had seen her like this
many times before but for some reason it was different this time.As he
contimued to watch her he hoped no one else noticed what was going on
with him.

"Look you guys said earlier you never wanted to hurt her so help us
find her killer,if know something tell me and we will put that person away
as well."
"Listen lady we don't have to help you with anything,we got what we
wanted from Gillian,she was nothing but trash anyway.All you women are the
same,you dress looking really hot and when your approached you turn us
down,don't you think that's pretty trashy?I mean come on look at you
detective wearing your tight fitted top and those sexy pants,how could a
man look at you and not want want you right then and there?"

Getting up from her chair Olivia walked over to Darren,sitting right
next to him she said,"Well no matter what I will personally make sure you
never get the oportunity to know what it is like to be with a woman
ever again,Rikers will be your home for a very very long time.You will pay
for what you did to Gilian,both of you."As Olivia got up from her chair
to leave the room Mitchell jumped out of his chair and as he did Elliot
busted in throughthe door and as he got in Olivia was lying on the
floor unconsious as Mitchell slammed her from behoind with his chair in the
back of the head.Elliot grabbed him through him against hte wall and
said,"You fucking bastard,you are going to pay for this for the rest of
your life.Don't think for one minute that I will let them release you
for anything,add assaulting a police officer to the charges and your stay
in Rikers will be a long one. Elliot cuffed Mitchell and pushed him
toward Munch as Fin cuffed Darren and Cragen called an ambulance for
Olivia.

"How sweet would it be to get that detective in my grasp mmmmmmmmmm
good" Mitchell said while licking his lips.Walking over to him Elliot got
in his face and said,"You keep licking them lips cause yoau re going to
need to make some lucky guy at Rikers very happy.Get him out of her
Munch." Elliot said.As htey ambulance arrived Cragen told Elliot to go
with Olivia.



                               Chapter 2
      A couple hours later Olivia woke up in the hospital seeing Elliot
sitting next to her."What happened",she asked.
"You were knocked uncontious by Mitchell with a chair.I'm happy to see
your ok.You really took a hard hit."
Smiling Olivia said,"I've certainly been hit harder."
Laughing Held her hand and said,"Liv,I have something I want to tell
you,it was surprise you but I can't hold it in any longer."
Sitting up in her bed Olivia said,"Ok go ahead,I'm listening,."
"Well it's been difficult for me to accept that Kathy doesn't want to
be married to me anymore as you well know,however,I've done alot of
thinking about it and I think it's difficult because of the children not
her.I just don't feel the same way about her as I used to,the love I had
for her just disappeared,it got lost somewhere along the way.I mean we
hardly ever see each other anymore and when we do all we do is
fight.Re,meber a while back when you asked me if there was someone else and I
told you I wish there was but it wasn't that?"
"Yes,I remember that." Olivia said.
"Well there was and is someone else and I can't stop thinking about
this person,especially now that I know I'm getting divorced.This person I
speak of is amazing,she makes me feel so special and important and that
what oi do for aliving is important not annoying or a problem,I receive
so much support from this person when it comes to everything."

"Wow Elliot,this person sounds pretty incredible,who is she,do I know
her?" Olivia sked.
Putting his head down and closing his eyes wondering what her reaction
will be when he answers that qquestion elliot raises his head and says
looking deep into her beautiful brown eyes,"Yeah you know her,it's you
Live."
"WHAT??" She responds placing her hands over her mouth as tears fill
her eyes."Me,you are in love with me?"
"Yes Liv I am in love with you.You are so supportive and sweet and sexy
as hell.I just love absolutely everything about you,you have such a
loving heart and an amazing love for others.....I would like to kiss you
if that is ok?"
Smiling Olivia looks at Elliot and says,"Ok,it sure is ok.i have been
secretly attracted to you for a long time but never wanted to say
anything knowing you were married nad had children I didn't want tto be the
one to ruin all of that or come between you and Kathy.......As teears
fell from Olivia's eyes and she tryed to continue talking Elliot leaned
in taking her face into his hands and kissed her like he had never
kissed a woman before.Pulling back Olivia looked deep into Elliot's eyes and
said,"You realize we are heading for a plce I ahve never been
before.most guys I have been with have disrespected me or been very intimidated
about my job."
"Well Liv,you know those traits arn't in me,I know you area grat cop
and it doesn't intimidate me at all and I never ahve and never will
disrespect you."
"Smiling Olivia said,"I know,I just seem to be on my way somewhere I've
neve rbeen before.I've had feelins for past boyfriend's however,nothing
as strong as I feel for you,I never told you or let anyone else know
because I knew you were married and felt guilty enough for feelingthe ay
I do becasue you are married.I used to go home at night sit in my dark
living room and wonder what it would be like to be held in your warm
arms and have you kiss me so passionately and now I know."
"Liv,I have loved you for a while now but was afraid to admit it to
myself because somewhere along the way I forgot waht love felt like and
was afraid to deal with it all.Kathy and i lost what we shared a long
time ago and it scared me as well,however,she has moved on dating others
already and sence I have known for sometime how I feel about you I had
to be honest with myself and with you."Leaning in to place her lips onto
Elliot's Olivia began to cry and when she pulled away she said,"Elliot
you re what I have been looking so long for,a real man who is not
afraid to express his feelings and emotions with the person he loves."Just
as Elliot leaned into Olivia and they began kissing Fin and Munch
knocked on Olivia's hospital door.Both jumping Olivia and Elliot started
laughing and thinking to themselves,oh great,everyone will know now.


"Well, I see you are feeling much better Olivia" Munch cracked.
Replying Elliot said,"You know Munch jealeousy isn't a very attractive
quality."Everyone laughed and Fin chimed in saying,"yeah Munch,green is
definitly not your color."